Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Diabetes Joke Challenge

Our very own Lori Rode posted yesterday challenging us OCer's to come up with some Diabetes humor.

I actually wrote these last night so they may be funnier somewhere around midnight. I tried to come up with more but for now, this is all I have. Enjoy.

Joke #1
A Diabetic walks into a bakery as asks the guy behind the counter, “Whaddya got that is safe for diabetics?”

The Baker says, “Everything. As long as you don’t put it in your mouth.”

Joke #2
As the salesman was just about to close the shop two very excited diabetics (George and Scott) came running in the door!

“Wow, is that sign for real?” asks Scott.

“Which sign?” Asks the salesman

“Hello? The one on the front of your window!” replies George.

“Well of course” said the salesman.

“WE’LL TAKE TWO PLEASE! One for each of us!!!” they shout in unison.

“What do you want?” inquired the salesman.

“A Function Pancreas!” exclaims Scott.

“But this is a music store!!!” Says the salesman.

A look of confusion falls upon everyone’s face.

George sheepishly replies, “But the sign says ‘Organ’s for sale.’”

Riddle #1
Q - How many diabetics does it take to change a light bulb?

A - None. They will just use the light from their pumps.

Riddle #2
Q - Do you know what PWD’s and Hippie's have in common?

A - Neither one should drive if they are feeling “high.”

21 comments:

Lori Rode said...

George, you are THE MAN! You totally rock! My favorite's the first one. Thanks so much for writing jokes just to amuse me (and others).

Chrissie in Belgium said...

George - you should have been a commedian. Keep the jokes coming. I LIKE your jokes bigtime!!!!!! Lori was absolutely right - guys are more talented in this field, at least YOU are!

In Search Of Balance said...

Is this a contest? Because I think you won.

Melissa said...

George,
Love them! You had me laughing to myself at my desk. I think I will have to share them at our staff meeting this morning - since I work at the ADA they willbe appreciated.

Carey said...

That's good stuff.

Kerri. said...

George, these are simply too awesome!!! I'm laughing my ass off at "Organs for Sale." :D

Scott K. Johnson said...

G-Money!! You rock man!! I'm still brainstorming mine - but I've got my work cut out for me now!

MileMasterSarah said...

George,
Im loving the light bulb joke. You have no idea (or wait maybe you do) how many times I’ve tried to pass using only the pump light in the dark.

Allison said...

Best. Jokes. Ever. Really very awesome. I may have to send them to everyone I know.

Julia said...

Hippies. Hippies. Not possessive Hippie's. Please, please, for the love of god and me, the punctuation freak, fix that. You're hurting my poor brain.

Other than that, the jokes are hysterical. I love inside jokes. :D

George said...

LOL Sorry Julia. I am terrible with proper grammer and spelling and writing in general. But man, I make one hell of a Tuna Casserole.
Thanks for the tip though. I always feel stupid when I miss stuff like that! :)

Mike said...

Excellent! I especially liked the hippy joke.

Mike
The Dawn Phenomena

Scott said...

Cute! Too bad I'm not really a funny guy, or I'd add one to the list!

Anonymous said...

A Frenchman, a German and a Jewish man went hiking. The Frenchman says "I am tired and thirsty, I must have a glass of wine". The German says "I am tired and thirsty, I must have a glass of beer." The Jewish man says "I am tired and thirsty, I must have diabetes."

Dan B said...

- What did Dracula give his son asking for candy?
- A diabetic...

/Dan

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diabetes jokes, jokes about diabetes, diabetes humor, nurse jokes said...

wow! that sucks! i like that! it makes me laugh. thanks for this. it woke me up. i am not sleepy now. thanks for this.

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Houston Chiropractor Dr. Vanderloop, D.C. said...

Very informational article, will share this with fellow docs & friends. I wrote a similar article on how cinnamon lowers blood sugar levels-in-diabetics, it’s posted on our chiropractor blog here: http://thewellzone.org/2010/09/17/cinnamon-lowers-blood-sugar-levels-in-diabetics

Wishing You the Best in Health,

James M. Vanderloop, D.C.

Claire said...

Well. I don't think that they are very funny. I've had diabetes for 4 1/2 years and the one about the bakery totally contradicts all training i have ever had. I can eat what ever I want. I did enjoy the one about the insulin pumps lighting up the room, though.